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LYCONIDES

  Ah! my mother, I see a more convincing proof for you; she’s crying aloud — she’s in the pangs of labour.

  EUNOMIA

  Come in-doors here, with me, my son, to my brother, that I may obtain a grant from him of that which you beg of me.

  LYCONIDES

  Go; I’ll follow you this instant, mother. EUNOMIA goes into the house. But my servant, Strobilus, I wonder where he is, whom I ordered to wait here for me. Now I reflect with myself, if he’s lending me his assistance, it isn’t fair that I should be angry with him. I’ll go in-doors, where they are sitting in judgment upon my life. Goes into the house of MEGADORUS.

  Enter STROBILUS, with the pot of money.

  STROBILUS

  I, by myself, exceed the riches of the Griffins, who inhabit the golden mountains, For I’m unwilling to make mention of those other kings, beggarly fellows — I am the king Philip. O charming day! for when I went from here, just now, I arrived there much the first, and, long before, I placed myself in a tree, and thence observed where the old fellow hid the gold. When he departed thence, I let myself down from the tree, and dug up the pot full of gold. Thence, from that spot, I saw the old fellow betaking himself back again; he didn’t see me, for I turned a little on one side, out of the path. Heyday! here he comes himself. I’ll go and hide this away, at home. Goes into the house of MEGADORUS.

  Enter EUCLIO, tearing his hair and wringing his hands.

  EUCLIO

  I’m ruined! I’m done for! I’m murdered! Whither shall I run? Whither not run? Stop him — stop him. Whom? who? I don’t know. I see nothing! I’m going blindfold; and, in fact, whither I am going, or where I am, or who I am, I can’t in my mind find out for certain. To the AUDIENCE. I beseech you, give me your aid (I beg and entreat of you), and point me out the person that has taken it away. What’s the matter? Why do you laugh? I’m acquainted with you all; I know that there are many thieves here, who conceal themselves with white clothes and chalk, and sit as though they were honest! To one of the SPECTATORS. What say you? You I’m resolved to believe; for I perceive, even by your looks, that you are honest. Well then, none of these has got it? You’ve been the death of me! Tell me, then, who has got it? You don’t know? Oh,wretched, wretched me! I’m done for! wofully undone! In most sorry plight I go; so much groaning, and misfortune, and sorrow, has this day brought upon me, hunger and poverty, too. I’m the most utterly ruined of all men upon the earth! For what need of life have I, who have lost so much gold that I so carefully watched? I pinched myself, and my inclinations, and my very heart! Now others are rejoicing at this, my loss and my misfortune! I cannot endure it. He runs about, crying and stamping. Enter LYCONIDES, from the house of MEGADORUS.

  LYCONIDES

  What person, I wonder, is this before our house lamenting, and that utters complaints with his moaning? Why,surely, this is Euclio, as I imagine. I’m utterly undone! The thing’s all out; he knows now, as I suppose, that his daughter is brought to bed. I’m in a state of uncertainty now what I shall do, whether go or remain, accost him or fly.

  EUCLIO

  What person is it that speaks there?

  LYCONIDES

  ’Tis I, wretch that I am.

  EUCLIO

  Yes, and so am I, and wretchedly ruined, whose lot is misfortune so great and sorrow.

  LYCONIDES

  Be of good courage.

  EUCLIO

  How, prithee, can I be so?

  LYCONIDES

  Because that deed which is afflicting your mind, I did it, and I confess it.

  EUCLIO

  What is it I hear from you?

  LYCONIDES

  That which is the truth.

  EUCLIO

  What evil, young man, have I deserved, by reason of which you should do thus, and go to ruin both me and my children?

  LYCONIDES

  A Divinity was my prompter; he prompted me to do it.

  EUCLIO

  How?

  LYCONIDES

  I confess that I have done wrong, and I know that I deserve censure; for that reason I’m come to beseech you, that, with feelings assuaged, you will pardon me.

  EUCLIO

  Why did you dare do so, to touch that which was not your own?

  LYCONIDES

  What do you wish to be done? The thing has been done; it can’t be undone. I believe that the Gods willed it, for if they hadn’t willed it, I know it wouldn’t have happened.

  EUCLIO

  But I believe that the Gods have willed that I should be the death of you in fetters.

  LYCONIDES

  Don’t say that!

  EUCLIO

  What business then have you to touch what is my own against my will?

  LYCONIDES

  Because I did it under the evil influence of wine and love.

  EUCLIO

  Most audacious man, that you should dare to come here to me with that speech, you impudent fellow! For if this is lawful, so that you may be able to excuse it — let us openly, in broad daylight, plunder their golden trinkets from ladies — after that, if we are caught, let us excuse ourselves, that we did it when intoxicated, by reason of being in love. Too cheap are wine and love, if one in liquor and in love is allowed to do with impunity whatever he pleases.

  LYCONIDES

  But I come to you of my own accord to supplicate you on account of my folly.

  EUCLIO

  Persons don’t please me, who, when they’ve done wrong, excuse themselves. You knew that you had no right there; you oughtn’t to have touched.

  LYCONIDES

  Therefore, inasmuch as I did dare to touch, I make no objection to keep by all means.

  EUCLIO

  You, keep what is my own against my will?

  LYCONIDES

  Against your will, I do not ask; but I think that that which was yours ought to be mine. Moreover, Euclio, you’ll find, I say, that mine it ought to be.

  EUCLIO

  Now really, on my word, I’ll drag you to the Prætor and take proceedings against you, unless you make restitution.

  LYCONIDES

  Make restitution of what to you?

  EUCLIO

  What you’ve stolen of mine.

  LYCONIDES

  I, stolen of yours? Whence, or what is it?

  EUCLIO

  So shall Jupiter love you, how ignorant you are about it!

  LYCONIDES

  Unless, indeed, you tell me what you are enquiring for.

  EUCLIO

  The pot of gold, I say, I’m asking back of you, which you confessed to me that you had taken away.

  LYCONIDES

  By my faith, I’ve neither said so, nor have I done it.

  EUCLIO

  Do you deny it?

  LYCONIDES

  Yes, I do utterly deny it; for neither the gold nor yet this pot, what it means, do I know or understand.

  EUCLIO

  Give me up that pot which you took away from the wood of Sylvanus. Come, give it me back! I would rather give you the one-half of it. Although you are a thief to me, I’ll not be hard upon the thief. Give it me back.

  LYCONIDES

  You are not in your senses, to call me a thief; I thought, Euclio, that you had come to the knowledge of another matter; as concerns myself, it is a great matter which I wish to speak with you upon at your leisure, if you are at leisure.

  EUCLIO

  Tell me, in good faith, have you not stolen that gold?

  LYCONIDES

  In good faith, No.

  EUCLIO

  Nor know who has taken it away?

  LYCONIDES

  In good faith, No, to that as well.

  EUCLIO

  But if you should know who has taken it away, will you discover it to me?

  LYCONIDES

  I will do so.

  EUCLIO

  Nor accept of a share from him, whoever he is, for yourself, nor harbour the thief?

  LYCONIDES

/>   Even so.

  EUCLIO

  What if you deceive me?

  LYCONIDES

  Then may great Jupiter do unto me what he pleases.

  EUCLIO

  I’m satisfied. Come, then, say what you wish.

  LYCONIDES

  If you know me but imperfectly, of what family I’m born: Megadorus here is my uncle; Antimachus was my father; my name is Lyconides; Eunomia is my mother.

  EUCLIO

  I know the family; now, what do you want?

  LYCONIDES

  I want to know this. You have a daughter of yours?

  EUCLIO

  Why, yes, she’s there at home.

  LYCONIDES

  You have, I think, recently betrothed her to my uncle?

  EUCLIO

  You have the whole matter.

  LYCONIDES

  He has now bade me announce to you his refusal of her.

  EUCLIO

  A refusal, when the things are got ready, and the wedding’s prepared? May all the immortal Gods and Goddesses confound him, so far as is possible, by reason of whom this day, unhappy wretch that I am, I have lost so much gold!

  LYCONIDES

  Be of good heart, and speak in kindly terms; now, a thing — may it turn out well and prosperously to you and your daughter. — May the Gods so grant — say.

  EUCLIO

  May the Gods so grant.

  LYCONIDES

  And for me, too, may the Gods so grant it. Now, then, do you listen. The man that admits a fault is not so much to be despised, if he feels a sense of shame when he excuses himself. Now, Euclio, I do beseech you, that what unawares I have done wrong towards yourself or your daughter, you will grant me pardon for the same, and give her for a wife to me, as the laws demand. I confess that I did violence to your daughter on the festival of Ceres, by reason of wine and the impulse of youth.

  EUCLIO

  Woe is me! What shocking deed do I hear of you?

  LYCONIDES

  Why do you exclaim? You whom I’ve made to be a grandfather now at the very wedding of your daughter. For your daughter has just been brought to bed in the ninth month after — calculate the number; for that reason, in my behalf, has my uncle sent his refusal. Go in-doors; enquire whether it is so or not as I say.

  EUCLIO

  I’m undone utterly; so very many misfortunes unite themselves for my undoing. I’ll go in-doors, that I may know what of this is true. He goes into his house.

  LYCONIDES

  I’ll follow you this instant. This matter seems now to be pretty nearly in the haven of safety. Now, where to say my servant Strobilus is, I don’t know, but yet I’ll wait here still a little while; after that I’ll follow this man indoors; now, in the meantime, I’ll give him leisure to enquire of the nurse about my doings, the attendant of his daughter, whether she knows the truth. Moves as if going.

  ACT V.

  Enter STROBILUS, at a distance.

  STROBILUS

  to himself . Immortal Gods, with what and how great delights do you present me! I’ve got a four pound pot filled with gold; who there is richer than I? What man is there greater than I at Athens now; any one, I mean, to whom the Gods are propitious?

  LYCONIDES

  to himself . Why, surely, I seemed just now to hear the voice of some one speaking here.

  STROBILUS

  to himself . Ha! do I not see my master?

  LYCONIDES

  to himself . Do I see Strobilus now, my servant?

  STROBILUS

  to himself . ’Tis he himself.

  LYCONIDES

  to himself . ’Tis no other.

  STROBILUS

  to himself . I’ll accost him.

  LYCONIDES

  to himself . I’ll step out towards him. I do think that he has been, as I requested him, to the old woman, the nurse herself of this damsel.

  STROBILUS

  to himself . Why don’t I tell him that I’ve found this prize, and speak out? For that reason, I’ll beg of him to make me free. I’ll go and speak to him. Addressing him. I’ve found ——

  LYCONIDES

  What have you found?

  STROBILUS

  Not that which the boys cry out that they’ve found in the bean.

  LYCONIDES

  And are you trifling with me then, as you are in the habit of doing? He turns as if to go away.

  STROBILUS

  Master, stop; I’ll speak out then; do listen.

  LYCONIDES

  Come then, tell me.

  STROBILUS

  I’ve found to-day, master very great riches.

  LYCONIDES

  Where, pray?

  STROBILUS

  A four pound pot, I say, full of gold!

  LYCONIDES

  What crime is this that I hear of from you?

  STROBILUS

  I’ve stolen it from this old fellow, Euclio.

  LYCONIDES

  Where is this gold?

  STROBILUS

  In my box at home; I now wish to be made free.

  LYCONIDES

  I, make you free, you fellow, brimful of wickedness?

  STROBILUS

  Out upon you, master, I know what you would be at. Troth, I’ve cleverly tried your inclination; you were just getting ready to take it away from me; what would you do, if I had found it?

  LYCONIDES

  You can’t make good your pretences. Come, give up the gold!

  STROBILUS

  I, give up the gold?

  LYCONIDES

  Give it up, I say, that it may be given back to him.

  STROBILUS

  Where am I to get it from?

  LYCONIDES

  That which you confessed just now to be in your box.

  STROBILUS

  I’ faith, I’m in the habit of talking nonsense; ’twas in that way I was speaking.

  LYCONIDES

  seizinq him . But do you know what? ——

  STROBILUS

  Even kill me outright, i’ faith, you never shall get it hence of me ... A SUPPLEMENT TO THE AULULARIA BY CODRUS URCEUS.

  STROBILUS

  —— the pot belonging to the old fellow, which I’ve not got.

  LYCONIDES

  I will have it, whether you will or no; when I’ve tied you up all fours, and torn asunder your body for you tied up to the beam. But why do I delay to rush upon the jaws of this rascal, and why this instant do I not compel his soul to take its journey before its time? Are you going to give it me or not?

  STROBILUS

  I will give it you.

  LYCONIDES

  I want you to give it me now, and not at a future time.

  STROBILUS

  I’ll give it now; but I entreat you to allow me to recover breath. LYCONIDES lets him go. Aha! What is it you want me to give you, master?

  LYCONIDES

  Don’t you know, you rascal? And do you dare to refuse me the four pound pot full of gold which you just now said you had stolen? Calling at the door. Hallo there! Where now are the flogging men?

  STROBILUS

  Master, do hear a few words. Lyc. I won’t hear; floggers, hallo there — hallo!

  Enter two FLOGGING SLAVES.

  SLAVE.

  What’s the matter?

  LYCONIDES

  I want the chains to be got ready.

  STROBILUS

  Listen to me, I beg of you; afterwards order them to bind me as much as you please.

  LYCONIDES

  I will hear you; but hasten the matter very quickly.

  STROBILUS

  If you order me to be tortured to death, see what you obtain; in the first place, you have the death of your slave. Then, what you wish for you cannot get. But if you had only allured me by the reward of dear liberty, you would already have obtained your wish. Nature produces all men free, and by nature all desire freedom. Slavery is worse than every evil, than every calamity; and he whom Jupiter hates, him he first make
s a slave.

  LYCONIDES

  You speak not unwisely

  STROBILUS

  Now then hear the rest. Our age has produced masters too grasping, whom I’m in the habit of calling Harpagos, Harpies, and Tantali, poor amid great wealth, and thirsty in the midst of the waters of Ocean; no riches are enough for them, not those of Midas, not of Crœsus; not all the wealth of the Persians can satisfy their Tartarean maw. Masters use their slaves rigorously, and slaves now obey their masters but tardily; so on neither side is that done which would be fair to be done. Their provisions, kitchens, and store-cellars, avaricious old fellows shut up with a thousand keys. Slaves, thievish, doubledealers, and artful, open for themselves things shut up with a thousand keys, which the owners hardly like to be granted to their lawful children, and stealthily do they carry off, consume, and lick them up — fellows that will never disclose their hundred thefts even at the gibbet; thus in laughter and joking do bad slaves take revenge upon their slavery. So then, I come to the conclusion that liberality renders slaves faithful.

  LYCONIDES

  Rightly, indeed, have you spoken, but not in a few words, as you promised me. But if I do make you free, will you give me back what I’m asking for?

  STROBILUS

  I will give it back; but I wish for witnesses to be present; you’ll pardon me, master, I trust you but little.

  LYCONIDES

  Just as you please; let there be present even a hundred; then I shouldn’t care about it.

  STROBILUS

  going to the door of the house of MEGADORUS . Megadorus, and you, Eunomia, please come here, I beg of you; the business finished, you shall return directly.

  Enter MEGADORUS and EUNOMIA.

  MEGADORUS

  Who’s calling us? Ha! Lyconides!

  EUNOMIA

  Ha! Strobilus, what is the matter? Say.

  LYCONIDES

  ’Tis a short matter.

  MEGADORUS

  What is it?

  STROBILUS

  I’m calling you as witnesses. If I bring here a four pound pot full of gold and give it up to Lyconides, Lyconides makes me a free man, and orders me to be my own master. To LYCONIDES. Do you not promise me so?

  LYCONIDES

  I do promise so.

  STROBILUS

  Have you heard now what he has said?

  MEGADORUS

  We have heard.

  STROBILUS

  Swear, then, by Jupiter.

  LYCONIDES

  Alas! to what I am reduced by the misfortunes of others! You are too insulting; still, I’ll do what he bids me.

  STROBILUS

  Hark you, our generation hasn’t much confidence in people: the documents are signed; the twelve witnesses are present; the registrar writes down the time and the place; and still, the pleader is found to deny that it has been done.